My story
I had left the house thirty minutes earlier, and I was already spiralling.
My biggest fear wasn’t just the danger of leaving, it was knowing he still had access to everything. My bank logins. My MyGov account. My ATO portal. My iCloud. He could see everything. He could control everything. I couldn’t think clearly enough to stop him.
I ran to a friend who worked in IT and just said, "Help." I was in the foetal position on the lounge, shaking, too afraid to go near the windows. My brain had shut down. I couldn’t even think straight enough to change my own passwords.
My friend didn’t ask questions. He just started working.
“What’s your iCloud password?” I told him.
“What’s your email?” I handed over my keychain.
He reset every password. Enabled multi-factor authentication. Backed up my iCloud. Digitally, I was safe. He made sure my abuser couldn’t access my accounts, spy on me, or manipulate my data. For the first time in years, I felt a sliver of control.
But it didn’t last long.
The moment I knew I wasn’t free
That same night, he showed up.
Banging on the windows. Circling the house with a friend. The banging was so loud that the neighbours called the police.
They arrived seven hours later. Seven. Hours.
I hid under a blanket in the furthest part of the house, trying to make myself invisible. Trying to breathe without making a sound. Because when someone is hunting you, safety isn’t just physical. It’s digital. And even though my devices were locked down, he still found me.
The realisation that changed everything
I thought I had escaped. I was wrong.
Even after I left, even after my accounts were secure, he still found ways to track me. I didn’t know how. Maybe he followed me. Maybe he asked around. But he always knew where I was.
And then, he found out where I worked.
I don’t know how he did it. But suddenly, my workplace had to know about him. Photos were circulated in case he showed up. My bosses, my co-workers, everyone had to be on high alert. I had to warn people about my own stalker.It was humiliating. Embarrassing. A daily reminder that even after I had locked down my digital life, I still wasn’t safe.
That’s what terrified me the most: I had done everything right, and he still wouldn’t stop.
Why I created Control Alt Escape
Because I was lucky. I had someone who knew how to lock things down when I couldn’t.
Because most people don’t even realise they’re being tracked.
Because abusers use technology to control, stalk, and manipulate, and most systems haven’t caught up.
Digital safety is one part of the puzzle, but the real problem isn’t just technology. It’s the way abusers weaponise it to keep power long after we’ve left.
If I hadn’t had help that night, I would have lost everything.
This site is for the ones still whispering help through the panic.
It’s for the ones who have already left but still feel watched.
It’s for the ones planning their escape, knowing the hardest part isn’t just walking out, it’s staying gone.
Only recently have I healed enough to realise that I’m not the one who needs to be scared anymore. I have nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to fear, nothing to run from. That’s why I am here.
I offer this freely because no one should have to choose between freedom and safety.
Because locking the door isn’t enough anymore.
You are not useless. You are not alone.
Let’s get you one step ahead.
⚠️ This piece reflects personal memories and lived experience. Some identifying details may have been changed or withheld to protect privacy. Any resemblance to real individuals is unintentional. The story is shared with care and healing in mind.